best of IWTW

ABTS-153: Best of IWTW Vol. VIII

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and AJ continue to look back on the absurd things that were said during our conversation game I Was The Walrus! This episode features Jon Gabrus of the High & Mighty podcast, plus we learn why birdwatching is now illegal, as well as some of our host’s signature sex moves!

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Episode: ABTS-128: Sense of Nonsensicalness

Contestants: Bren vs. Matt
Category 1: What is the next Sci-Fi franchise starting with Star ____?
Round 1: Star Jammers vs. Star Search
Category 2: Imagine you are a planet, what is your terrain made out of and what is the most populous creature that lives on you?
Round 2: Giant fleshy ball of skin with self doubt creatures vs. Spacecrest in habited by Ryan Spacecrest?
Category 3: Name a galaxy. Instead of the Milky Way, what is yours?
Round 3: The Horse Butt Nebula vs. The View

Episode: ABTS-129: Jon Gabrus Interview

Contestants: Bren vs. Gabrus
Category 1: If you could have a convenient machine serve anything, what would it be?
Round 1: Machine that injects cheesecake into your bloodstream vs. A variety sandwich machine
Category 2: If gravity were reversed, what would be your best method of staying on Earth?
Round 2: Spiderman around with box turtles vs. Monkey bars
Category 3: What is the most unlikely thing to find at the bottom of the ocean?
Round 3: Yourself vs. An above ground pool

Episode: ABTS-131: Noun Haze

Contestants: Bren vs. Mark
Category 1: What is the name of your strain of weed?
Round 1: Denmark Junglediddle vs. Stinky Tupperware
Category 2: Birdwatching is now illegal. What is the new hobby?
Round 2: Bear-tickling vs. Bark-tasting

Episode: ABTS-134: Drunk In Game

Contestants: Bren vs. Doug
Category 1: Come up with a name that’s a combination of two names. Funniest one wins!
Round 1: Jameeliam vs. Fergelica
Category 2: How would you post bail using only Omegle?
Round 2: Hope for a mutual jerk off session vs. Make a face out of my ass using my dick as a nose
Category 3: What is the next big MMO game?
Round 3: A game in prison where you have to post bail using Chat Roulette vs. Find That Person!

Episode: ABTS-135: Chaos And Tears

Contestants: Bren vs. Mark
Category 1: You are making the next psychological thriller game. What is the Shyamalan twist?
Round 1: You are in Mark’s brain vs. You are entertainment for rich people
Category 2: What is your signature sex move?
Round 2: The Stanky Taun Taun vs. Friday Night Lights
Category 3: What is the name of your one hit wonder?
Round 3: Dat Dang Ol’ Pussy Stank vs. Don’t Leave Tonight


ABTS-151: Best of IWTW Vol. VII

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and Matt look back on some of our strangest goofs from the conversation game I Was The Walrus! Some of which include: the inception of, the color Hodgman, Press Continue Podcast returns, as well as the “birth” of Humpmaster 7.

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Episode: ABTS-098: This Open World Is Too Open

Contestants: Doug vs. Bren
Category 1: If your earlobes grew an inch a day, what would keep you from giving up on life?
Round 1: Crowdfunding sites vs. Nothing. I would turn them into a noose and kill myself.

Episode: ABTS-099: BreadShoes.Rocks

Contestants: Doug vs. Bren
Category 1: If there was a new color what would you name it?
Round 1: Dro vs. Hodgman
Category 2: If you could ban one type of clothing, what would it be?
Round 2:  Overalls vs. Flat brimmed hats
Category 3: What restaraunt franchise do you play a prank at, and what is the prank?
Round 3:  Pail of rocks falling on Panera Bread customers vs. Subway fliers with Jared saying ‘Kids love our footlongs’

Episode: ABTS-106: – Touch Yourself

Contestants: Doug vs. Matt
Category 1: If you could ask Tom Hanks for a favor, what would it be?
Round 1: Break me out of jail vs. Record my voicemail

Episode: ABTS-112: Legal PCP (Press Continue Podcast)

Contestants: Adam vs. Brittany
Category 1: If you could turn the other persons teeth into anything, what would you choose?
Round 1: Fire vs. Candy corn

Episode: ABTS-120: The Next Big Rhythm Game

Contestants: Bren vs. Doug
Category 1: What is the funniest hack you can do to someone?
Round 1: Make Kanye West a horse girl vs. Audio hack ABTS on everyone
Category 2: If you had to come up with the next big rhthym game, what would it be?
Round 2: Hambone Jambone vs. HumpMaster 7 Rebirth Edition
Category 3: If you could make the next trend in the car scene what would it be?
Round 3: Deeper dish rims for four alphalty pizzas vs. A dick for an antenna


ABTS-149: Best of IWTW Vol. VI

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and Bren continue to clog your feed with reflections of the past year’s conversation game I Was The Walrus! We revisit the Attack stopping by to play a few games, as well as hear one of Mark’s categories getting rejected!

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Episode: ABTS-090: Nailed By A Meteor

Contestants: AJ vs. Bren
Category 1: Who do you wish you could run for president?
Round 1: Steve Urkel vs. Flint Lockwood
BS Category: Why is Kazaam your favorite movie?
BS Round: He needs a fake name vs. The movie come to an end
Category 2: What do you wish could rain from the sky?
Round 2:  Christina Applegate vs. Dildos

Episode: ABTS-092: Catching Up With Bruce

Contestants: Bruce vs. Bren
Category 2: If you could name a new NFL team, what is their name and the symbol on the helmet?
Round 2:  Arizona ’69ers vs. Arizona Dickbutts

Episode: ABTS-093: The Attack Takes Over

Contestants: Alex vs. Yaniv
Category 1: What class do you wish they taught in high school?
Round 1: How to hide your penis class in gym class vs. Hiking
Category 2: If you could own a restaurant what is the name and the famous dish?
Round 2:  McDonald’s Shits vs. Mostly C???

Contestants: Evanne vs. Yaniv
Category 1: If your dick was made of glass, how would you smash it?
Round 1: All my girlfriends faces vs. Alex’s face revised to a finishing wrestling move
Category 2: If you could go big game hunting throughout all of fiction, what would you want stuffed and mounted on your wall?
Round 2: Orc from LOTR vs. Scar from The Lion King
Category 3: What do you wish the human body could expel?
Round 3: Stuffed animals vs. Nickelodeon Slime

Contestants: Evanne vs. Alex
Bonus Category:
 It turns out your toilet is a portal, where does it lead?
Bonus Round: Johto (Pokemon world) vs. Shit factory

Episode: ABTS-095: Blindly Groping

Contestants: Doug vs. Mark
Category 1: What is the seventh sense?
Round 1: Feeling aliens vs. Dreaming of people who have not been born


ABTS-147: Best of IWTW Vol. V

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and Bren reflect on the best I Was The Walrus moments of the past year by adding some commentary. Please enjoy some of our best goofs over the course of December!

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Episode: ABTS-078: The New Year’s Spectacular

Contestants: Mark vs. Doug
Category: You are building a video game and it’s an FPS like Doom. What is the most horrifying monster you can come up with?
Round 1: A creature that knows who you love most and takes all of your insecurities and projects them at you, some crazy emo shit hahahah vs. The most flexible woman
Category: Like a State Farm commercial you can summon anyone you want, who is it? Bonus points for jingle.
Round 2: Some guy from Walmart holding raw meat? vs. Your Drug Dealer (Jingle: Like a good dealer, bring me dank nugs!)

Episode: ABTS-084: Video Game Withdrawal

Contestants: Mark vs. Bren
Category: What is the symbol on your chest and what does it represent (you as a superhero)?
Round 1: Tesseract for Ayayka vs. Bag for Bagman

Episode: ABTS-086: HDMI Cables As Belts

Contestants: Matt vs. Bren
Category 1: What TV show cast would you want to save you from being kidnapped?
Round 1: The Secret Life of Alex Mack vs. The Surreal Life
Category 2: You are able to create a legendary artifact with powers. What is the name, item, and power?
Round 2: Steal Gloves vs. Powerglove of Revengeance
Category 3: What is the name of your murder mystery novel?
Round 3:  Nabrok She Wrote vs. Buzzfeed Spree


ABTS-077: Best of IWTW Vol. IV

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and Bren wish our listeners a Merry Christmas and conclude this four part series that showcases the best moments of our conversation game I Was The Walrus. This episode features XP Earned Podcast and Charles Max Wood! Have a great holiday!

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I Was The Walrus:

The I Was The Walrus theme song is brought to you by DJ CutmanCheck out his SoundCloud here!

Episode: ABTS-053: Thinking Outlandishly

Contestants: Matt vs. Kier
What game show host would you like to take the life of? (Not kill, but only live their game show life)
Round 2: Wayne Brady on Let’s Make a Deal vs. Drew Carey on Whose Line is it Anyway
What’s your worst fear’s fear?
Round 3: Driving on a highway in front of a cop that’s filming an episode of Cops vs. Everything

Episode: ABTS-054: XP Earned Interview

Contestants: Shane vs. Jessi
Category 3: If you could give any game franchise a cart game, what would it be? 
Round 3: The Last of Us vs. God of War
Category 1: If you were the founder of a new planet, what would you name it?
Round 1: Earth 2: Electric Boogaloo vs. That Big One Over There

Episode: ABTS-058: Charles Max Wood Interview

Contestants: Charles vs. Doug
Category 1: You are the keeper of the forest, what do you do to troll the inhabitants?
Round 1: Eat all the fresh fruit and then gas the forest vs. Plug up all the holes that the critters live in

Episode: ABTS-060: The Game Meister (Burgerbasta Bastaburger)

Contestants: AJ vs. Doug
Category 2: If you had to create a chimera?
Round 2:  Buzzard with two heads (Whoopi Goldberg + Dave Coulier) vs. Body of Komodo Dragon, wings of a Condor, head of a hammerhead shark, alternating legs of a giant octopus and a Goliath birder eater
Category 3: If you could pick any classic rock song to be the theme of your life, what would it be? 
Round 3:  Crazy on You – Heart vs. Taking Care of Business – Bachman Turner Overdrive

Episode: ABTS-062: Bruce Ties The Knot

Contestants: Bruce vs. Mark
If you could take any character from one universe and put them in another, who and where?
Round 1: The God Zeus in Magic Mike XXL vs. Stanley Yelnats in the movie Interstellar
Where in the world was Carmen Sandiego this whole time? Better back story wins.
Round 3: After completing the Italian job, Carmen was driven off a bridge when two of her fellow thieves tried to take all of the gold and the vaseline. As she swam downward away from the machine gun fire, she found an underwater cave where the seven sages were congregating. After enticing them with her soaking wet body she was able to open up a portal to ??? where some say she reigns as dark princess to this day vs. Nobody has any idea what the fuck Mark is talking about.
Contestants: Bren vs. Doug
You’re naked in school again and you have to explain to the teacher why or you go to jail.
Round 2: So claustrophobic that the mere thought of clothes restricting me would put me in a panicked state vs. Because you told me today was No Clothes Day


ABTS-075: Best of IWTW Vol. III

In this episode of ABTS, Doug and Bren discuss some more highlights of the conversation game I Was The Walrus. Listeners will get updates on a high speed car chase as well as learn about why Bren’s current Steam name is Dr. Toasty Buns.

Rate Almost Better Than Silence on iTunes if you get the chance!

I Was The Walrus:

The I Was The Walrus theme song is brought to you by DJ CutmanCheck out his SoundCloud here!

Episode: ABTS-017: There’s A Knock At Basta’s Door

Contestants: Doug vs. Matt
Category 2: What material would your Harry Potter wand be made of? And what would be the core?
Round 2: Igneous Rock and Plutonium vs. Twizzlers and Marijuana
Category 3: What USB extension would you not want to have?
Round 3: USB Heating Gloves vs. USB Sony Walkman

Episode: ABTS-045: Money Eating Club

Contestants: Bren vs. Mark
Category 1: If you could save one animal species to escape the apocalypse with you, what would it be?
Round 1: Pig vs. Cow
Category 2: If you could choose to be intolerant to a type of food, what would it be?
Round 2: Beer vs. Dog
Category 3: How many fingers am I holding up? (Revised: in my mouth?)
Round 3: 5 vs. 6

Episode: ABTS-047: Who the Hell is Dr. Toasty Buns

Contestants: Matt vs. Mark
Category 2: If a new landmass arose and you are the first to discover it, what would you name your land?
Round 2:  Canada 2: Queen Elizabeth’s Revenge vs. 3PieceKingLand
Category 3: The imaginary friend you’ve never been able to describe has just become visible. Describe this person.
Round 3:  Jeff Goldblum w/ a vestigial twin of Christopher Walken vs. Mark’s lame poem

Episode: ABTS-049: Undesirable Porn

Contestants: Mark vs. Doug
What is the mascot to the new cereal by General Mills?
Round 1: Unfortunate Boy vs. A Wet Towel for Soggy-O’s
You’re a cosmic blacksmith and can make armor out of anything. What is your armor made out of?
Round 2: Tromboners vs. Galaxies
Contestants: Matt vs. Bren
Where is the funniest place to poop in your neighbor’s house at 3am?
Round 2: In a tube of toothpaste vs. In the oven